Hey bees!
I'm back!!! I have definitely been going through an emotional rollercoaster these past few months and have honestly had several moments when I wanted to just throw in the towel. I just wanted to give up sometimes because I felt that there's no point to continue. It sounds sad, humiliating and shocking, but I need to be truthful and pour my heart out. My love life, personal relationships and daily behavior has been an absolute mess. I can't tell the man I have developed feelings for that I like him because I'm afraid it will affect our friendship. I am constantly reminded that "true friends" are hard to find and I need to work on my finding ways to better myself as a human being.
It's funny how someone can look a certain way on the exterior, but feel completely different in the interior. I almost feel as if I have been living a lie and painting a false image of who I am to people. It's time for a change. I've giving up on living a lie.
I was praying earlier today and I thought for a sec "What ever happened to my blog?" "What ever happened to the real me?" "Am I just a weakling?" I have been asking God for a sign and I think he is trying to show me what I have been depriving myself of; true happiness, personal goals/ objectives and a peaceful state of mind. It has to stop. I have to stop.
Over the next few weeks, I'm going to continue to share my life experiences with you all as I did in the past while focusing on my thoughts, emotions and real life happenings. Hopefully with me being more open with you guys, you will be more comfortable with me to ask questions related to my daily experiences. I'm going to try and write a post everyday this week. #7DayChallenge. Yal deserve it, I deserve it. I am no longer afraid.
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